The Poor Loser
by Sgt. Moffitt
Summary: It's almost Armistice Day, and Hogan can't help but twit the Kommandant about it...


_A/N: I don't own Hogan's Heroes and I don't get paid for this; it is truly a labor of love._

Klink's reflections following the events of "I Look Better in Basic Black". Dialogue from the episode is included.

* * *

November 10, 1944

Hogan breezed into the office with his usual insouciant manner and ingratiating smile. "Request permission for my men to have extra rations tomorrow."

Klink sighed as he looked up from his endless paperwork. "Why do you want extra rations?"

_As if I don't know,_ he thought wearily. _We're all hungry here, Hogan._

Hogan looked both surprised and offended. "Don't tell me you've forgotten! It's a holiday!"

Klink stared at him blankly. "What holiday?"

"Armistice Day!"

Klink continued to stare at him, a hundred thoughts jostling each other in his head, and Hogan elaborated, "The day we beat the Germans in the first world..." He cut himself off, as if he had only just realized that Klink might take this amiss.

Klink was not fooled. He stiffened and his eyes narrowed as he regarded Hogan with displeasure. _Trust an American to speak of the Great War in terms of "beating the Germans". No one was a winner in that conflict...millions of people died, and for what?_

Hogan looked away and murmured, "Sorry, sir, it's in bad taste," although he didn't sound sorry at all.

It was indeed in bad taste, and Klink denied the request for extra rations, as he decided it had been made only to give Hogan an opportunity to rub salt in an old, old wound.

Hogan turned to go, muttering something about a "poor loser", but he stopped in his tracks and came back to the desk where Klink was sitting. He leaned in close and said confidentially, "What do you hear from your old boss Captain Heinrich?"

Klink decided to ignore the little jab about the obnoxious Gestapo captain who had brought those three American women to Luftstalag 13 a few days before. True, Heinrich had been remarkably high-handed with Klink, but he was definitely _not_ Klink's boss. However, he _was_ Gestapo, and Klink never argued with Gestapo officers, regardless of rank.

Except he _had_ laid down the law to Heinrich about removing the young ladies from Luftstalag 13 as soon as possible. As Hogan had pointed out, the presence of three comely females in an all-male camp could only result in trouble.

Captain Heinrich had left with the three young ladies, and Klink, although glad they were no longer his concern, had been (belatedly) consumed with worry about what would happen to them once they left Luftstalag 13.

After a couple of sleepless nights, he had been overjoyed to get news of the young ladies and Captain Heinrich. So overjoyed, in fact, that he was very happy to pass the news on to Colonel Hogan now. Klink watched Hogan very closely as he said:

"The captain you admire so much, Hogan, has met with disgrace."

Hogan was all wide-eyed innocence. "No!"

Klink smiled, remembering. "He allowed the three lady prisoners to escape."

"I can't believe it!"

Klink had to chuckle as he related the story that the Captain had been rendered _hors de combat_ by means of a lady's handbag, and Hogan nodded thoughtfully.

Klink shook his finger at him. "If headquarters would have left those women with me, this never would have happened!" he declared, conveniently forgetting that he had insisted that Heinrich remove the women even earlier than planned. "Because of them, the enemy bombed one of our most important experimental stations!"

_Maybe I've said too much. _He recollected himself and waved Hogan away. "Dismissed."

Hogan headed for the door, remarking casually: "Rockets?"

"Why, yes," Klink replied, but Hogan was gone.

Klink stared at the closed door, thinking.

Those USO entertainers were safely away from the Gestapo, and somehow they had managed to contact the Allies about what they had discovered while behind enemy lines: a rocket base, as Hogan so astutely guessed. One that was bombed not twenty-four hours after the girls had made their escape.

A blow to the Reich, of course, but Klink could not feel any dismay about the occurrence. Not even if Hogan had been involved, as he strongly suspected.

No, he could only be relieved that the Allies were winning the war.

Tomorrow would be the sixth Armistice Day since his country had invaded Poland; twenty-six years since the conclusion of the war to end all wars. As far as Klink was concerned, the sooner this current and even more terrible war ended, the better.

He smiled sadly. What was it that Hogan had called him? Ah yes, a poor loser. If Hogan only knew!

Let the Allies be the victors once again. Klink could only pray that next year's Armistice Day would find the world at peace.


End file.
